Wayne Dyer was an American philosopher, self-help author, and motivational speaker. The first book I ever read of Dyer’s was one lent to me called Your Erroneous Zones, one of the best-selling books of all time (estimated to be 35 million to date).
It changed my perspective on the mind and allowed me to realize how many useless emotions humans are capable of feeling. It wasn’t too long after reading that book that Dyer passed away. Despite his passing, his wisdom and teachings will live on, so shout outs to my brother on the other side for his lifelong dedication of enlightening humanity to a higher way of being.
1. Have A Mind That Is Open To Everything & Attached To Nothing
Our mind’s conditioning causes us to (if we aren’t open minded enough) attach to our beliefs, philosophies, perspectives, and patterns of thought.
Our adoption, belief, and attachment to our mind reinforces a “worldview” which can, in most cases, prevent one from seeing and experiencing life in a new way, thus preventing one from experiencing benefits which may only come about when that worldview is dissolved and new ones are embraced.
This notion of being open to everything and attached to nothing is a conscious decision to dissolve that worldview, and to be open, as best as we can, to news forms of seeing and doing things that hold the possibility to enrich our lives and our beings in a way which we previously could not even have conceived. It’s like being born in the West but being open to explore foods in other cultures; we allow our tastebuds to experience and celebrate the joy of new flavours.
2. You Cannot Give Away What You Don’t Have
If I promised to give you 20 dollars for a bet we made (that you won), I would have to make sure that I had 20 dollars in the first place. I cannot give you what I don’t have. When the time comes around for me to give you the money, if I don’t have it, it makes me look bad. I wasn’t true to my word.
This is how life works.
I’m a writer, and part of my goal with my writing is to enlighten readers with inspirational wisdom that feeds their soul. In order for me to shed light on unique insights, I need to experience them myself in the first place! I need to cultivate that wisdom inside of me, for myself. Only then will I have wisdom to give away.
This also occurs for love as well. The most fundamental aspect of any thriving relationship is love. In order to give love to others, we must first foster that love within us.
What do you want to give away? Work to cultivate lots of it.
3. There Are No Justified Resentments
We are presented with two choices in regards to the “bad” things that have happened to us in life: to continue feeling hurt over past events knowing (or not knowing) that we will never be able to change them, or accept that they did happen, change our perspective about them, let them go so they stop hurting us, and seize our present moments to consciously be happy and at peace with ourselves and our lives.
It’s really that simple. There are no justified resentments. Life is as it is. We cannot ever change that fact. We will never wield that power. But what we do have power over is how we choose to feel and live in any given moment. And that in itself is a powerful thing.
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“There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.” — Epictetus
4. Don’t Die With Your Music Still In You
We each have a tune that we would like to dance to; this tune we hear inside of us, and depending if we have the courage to dance to it (even as the world watches) means, more than likely, whether or not we will be happy with ourselves and our lives. Have the courage to dance to your song. You know exactly what I’m talking about. It sways us left, right, this way, that way, guiding us forward and onward on a path that is unique to us.
“And those that hear the music were thought to be insane by those who could not.” – Nietszche
5. Embrace Silence
We live in a chaotic world of noise and distraction; it is good to get some silence in each day to tune out (of the world) and tune in (to ourselves).
When we get in touch, ideally through meditation (it is the simplest and most effective way), with the space and silence that exists within us, we realize something: we realize God, or whatever word you want to give for the unifying force that permeates all of existence.
We see the world in a bunch of polarities; hot and cold, dark and light, rich and poor. God unifies all things, and time spent in silence helps us realize this; that all ultimately is one and the same. What is song without silence? What is matter without space? All things exist in equal accordance with each other.
Silence helps us realize the truth that exists within us.
6. Give Up Your Personal Story
We each have a story that we cling to that gives us an idea of who we are and what we are about. It consists of our ideas, our experiences, our beliefs and thought patterns, as explained in the first example.
I will never forget a quote by Wayne Dyer which said, “If you are what you do, then when you don’t, you aren’t.”
To put into context what that means, I’ll give you a personal example.
For a long time now I’ve identified as a writer. I write often, and feel so damn good about it it feels like a tsunami of bliss whenever I get a good writing session going. But there come times where I lose touch of that side of me. I find that the more dearly I cling onto that notion of myself being a writer, the more inner turbulence I experience whenever I don’t feel like writing. I feel so false. I feel so frustrated. I feel lost and hopeless.
“If you are what you do, then when you don’t, you aren’t.”
I’ve learned how to rid myself of those feelings that torment me, though. I had to “shed my story,” I had to shed the identity I had of myself, of being a writer. How many of us operate in such a way? We hold on to notions of ourselves and do not allow us the space and opportunity for us to be much else.
It again requires us to “be open to everything and remain attached to nothing.” In every moment, our needs changes, and if we can be true to our inclinations within each moment, trust our intuition, welcome spontaneity, learn to let go of rigorously held beliefs, and seize opportunities as they come, then I am sure that there will be less resistance and more peace and joy, and, more than likely—fun!
7. You Can’t Solve A Problem With The Same Mind That Created It
Let’s say we’re stuck with an issue of ours in life, and we’ve been stuck with the dilemma for a while. We’ve been busting our heads and cannot seem to find a solution. What do we do?
We need to grow.
You see, it isn’t life that creates problems, it’s our perception of life that creates problems. If we’re stuck somehow in some way, what is needed is either a new way of seeing things or a new way of doing things. In either case, a creative solution will be found.
8. Treat Yourself As If You Already Were What You’d Like To Become
Let me tell you: you are a paradox. I know this because I myself am a paradox. Let me explain:
I have a vision for the person I want to become/I am. At the present moment, I am not this person, because that vision I have of mine is an ideal, and this state of excellence, mastery and perfection is a progression to be strived for. At the same time, I realize that this person that I see, this person that I know to be true in my heart is a potentiality. I am a paradox; I am and am not the vision in my head simultaneously.
The secret to accelerating the emulation of this potential is to believe that you already are it. Believe you already embody all the virtues which constitute that vision. If you are striving for success, be that success. If you are striving to be a legendary writer, write legendary. If you want to be a great singer, you must believe it so.
What you believe, you will become.
“If you believe it in your head you will hold it in your hand.” – Bob Proctor
“Whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.” – Jesus
Your thoughts have tremendous power. Believe that and see for yourself.
9. Treasure Your Divinity
You are alive, and you are part of this universe. And there exists an intelligent force that animates both you and it.
People have given names to this force since time immemorial; God, spirit, consciousness, the universe, Brahman, Logos, Tao, nature.
The name doesn’t really matter. What does matter is that you understand that this thing that animates you is very special.
We can’t really understand it. Imagine: we are tiny aspects of life, part of the macrocosm of the universe; almost irrelevant. But we aren’t. We are special and important, just as each cell within our bodies is microscopic, and special and important in their own unique ways.
Treasure your divinity! Embrace your worth.
10. Wisdom Is Avoiding All The Thoughts That Weaken You
Our mind is a constant feed of thoughts, some good and some bad.
Wisdom is embodying enough awareness to stop the perpetuation of all the thoughts that do us no good.
What are these thoughts? They are the ones that bring us sorrow, fill us with doubt, fill us with fear, lower our self-esteem, destroy relationships, instill us with negativity, cause us frustration, anger us, sway us from the path, make us forget our highest truths and disconnect us from the world and people around us.
Wisdom is fostering enough self-awareness within us to know when these thoughts are occurring, so we can stop them and fuel thoughts and truths that empower us and make us feel whole and capable of becoming the person we want to become and living the lives we want to live.